Dealing with Hate

Wednesday 21 March 2018

So I've been asked a question a few times too many on whether I receive hate and what I do about it? Well yes, I'm sure I do--I recently had a conversation with someone who actually told me she knew me through her cousin who was mocking my Instagram page (??). I've once had someone comment 'sekadar' on one of my photos where I was genuinely feeling FOMO that I couldn't attend an event. Oh! I've even had a keyboard warrior saying how my face is ugly and square. (Cheers bro, let me see this beautiful perfectly-shaped face of yours.)

More recently, someone on Reddit was saying how he/she was sick and tired of my FashionValet outfits at Empire beach and how I wasn't as inspiring as someone who was creating awareness for a condition or as someone who was more vocal in terms of her opinions. First of all, totally agree with that person, I'm also sick and tired of my photos at Empire. I just can't think of other places most of the time and Empire is a nice place. Secondly, I love those girls you mentioned. I love listening to what they have to say and I of course look up to those who create public awareness for serious things that happen around us. But... for someone who talks strongly about inspiring... why do you have the need to take others down and discredit them for what they do?

I suppose we're all different and we all get annoyed about something, so we're all bound to dislike someone. Maybe if I meet the people who mock me, we wouldn't get along anyway because our interests are different, you know? But it always amazes me how we can just hate a person we don't know... or invade someone's sanctuary by spreading negativity on their social media page. I'm no saint, don't get me wrong. It's a reminder for myself, first and foremost. But... the things people say... (are) horrible.

I was upset with something one day and I had all these ugly things to say but as I was scrolling through my gram feed, a quote made me feel better... Always be kinder than you feel. I think that's more realistic don't you think? You can't control what you feel, but you can always choose to be kind. You may dislike or get annoyed or don't understand the choices other people make, but you can always choose to play nice.

How do I deal with the hate? It used to get to me, I won't lie. I mean, I'm only human and it does not feel nice to hear all the things people say (and these are the ones I hear and read... does not include those said behind my back). I cannot imagine how public figures can stand the amount of hate they get everyday. I mean the things you find on the internet are incredibly dreadful! I only receive... a tiny speck of it and I think at one point I already contemplated whether I should continue or not. But Alhamdulillah I'm grateful for all the doors that have opened for me. 

Today.. it still gets me a little but only for a second and then I shrug it off. It's really impossible to please everyone. After a while, you realise that what matters is you and what makes you happy, your family, your friends, your health, your sanity, your emotional wellbeing, your faith, your dreams, your life. Once you set your mind, there's no turning back.

Dear reader, I hope you never let anyone stop you from dreaming and becoming whatever it is you want to be. And if they do, and mock your photos, or posing, or clothes, or face, I hope you always choose to be kind. I know it's hard but I'm working on it too.


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